Today I ate a tasty shrimp salad down the road from our hotel. I was really enjoying it until I realised the poo hadn’t been removed from their backs, reminded me of when my kids did poos that went right up their backs. I love my kids, but I wouldn’t eat their poo, let alone the poo of a bottom feeder! My Auntie ate her daughter’s poo once, she thought it was gravy on her arm and she licked it off. Dirty bitch! She is far from both things actually, more born again and cuddly Grandmaish.
Tomorrow I’m going on a blind play date, sans the comforting warmth of Cilla Black to ease the awkwardness. My date is a Singaporian stay-at-home Dad. My friend just asked (by the power of what’s app) whether I was taking the kids with me. Imagine if I turned up alone?! I hope the children behave accordingly, they can be a bit hit and miss in company. Tonight my daughter stabbed my husband’s boss in the arm with a fork while my son made demands to take over my iPad in a Smeagol style that would terrify Frodo!
I hope I can avoid being too sweaty and shouts at the kids!